jinglehells | week 3

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week 3

week 3

WEEK 3

Another week gone and it's still Christmas! Or is it? The paint on the walls is beginning to crack and fade, with especially large chunks in character's bedrooms revealing scratched words like "cantgetoutcantgetout" and "god help me i just want to go home i miss my home i miss my mother i miss" etc. Yikes! The locations page might be updated throughout the week as characters discover more. Seems like now's the perfect time to investigate and hope you'll get closer to finding out what's going on here. There's always more places to look and more things to find!

As a reminder that this week's activity check is now live! And as usual, it's never a bad time to submit threads for regains! Have you been naughty or nice? Naughty children still get presents too, don't worry. And if you'd like to check-in on Thursday night, you always can! You never know what fun you might run into.

So go exploring, find something new and pay no mind to the creepy writing on the walls. We're sure everything will be fine! After all, nothing ever goes wrong on Christmas, right?

sunday | monday | tuesday | wednesday | thursday

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[Is he right? Of course he's right. Of course he's right. But that isn't able to make it past the wall of sadness, and the resurgence of his depression. No, Chuuya just doesn't get it. He's not in this position. No one else is. Everyone that kills gets killed except for him. He shouldn't be alive. He wasn't smart enough to prevent her death, or Lena's, or what happened to Arai afterwards.

He wants to do something but....

I'm tired of living.]

I'm don't know how to keep going.

If you can't find a reason for it, that's not something anyone else can give you.

[they can make offers, they can give suggestions, but ultimately it's the person taking them who has to make something of that.]

But you keep going the same way you have been. You get up, you do the shit you have to do. Or if you really want to give up, then whatever, that's up to you.

But it's still running away if you do that, yeah? If you don't think you should be alive, then I think making yourself live anyway is as good a punishment as any. Make up for it by living and figuring out what's going on here.

[He's silent for a good while.

"I know it might not seem true now, but you've got the makings of someone who's going to do something great."

Shintaro places his hand on his chest, feeling the small, white and orange pin attached to it. Live for her. For both of them. Prove that she was right about him. If only, if only if only if only it was that easy. The pain and guilt are unbearable. Shintaro Kisaragi is completely worthless and utterly pathetic.

But maybe he doesn't need to get any more worthless and pathetic than this.

"I'm glad your friend is okay."

"You will be too, someday."]

Yeah.

I know.

[if this is something chuuya was ever truly able to relate to, it's in a past he doesn't care to think about. not wanting to live is unthinkable, not pushing on just as much so; it's hard to imagine that drive not being there.

it makes him think of dazai, and he'd rather not.

at that answer, he breathes out a sigh, straightens back up and adjusts the coat trying to slip from his shoulders.]

If you know, then the rest is up to you. Do what you want.

[His mood doesn't quite change, but at least he's actually moving. Maybe not thinking is best.

After a while, Shintaro raises up his hand, a torn, yellowing piece of paper between his fingers.]

Read this.

[chuuya takes the paper cautiously, brow furrowing as he reads through it.]

'Batches', huh... shit, what's that make this, some kind of messed up holiday experiment?

Yeah.

Seems more like a ritual than an experiment.

[Sigh...]

Find anything similar?

This place gets more and more fucked up, huh. Wonder if this is what the Christmas theme was supposed to turn out like...

[chuuya runs his fingers through his hair, a little agitated. anytime the downward spiral of 'this shit is fucked' would like to stop, that'd be great, thanks.]

Where'd you find that? I haven't seen anything like it.

In my room.

Don't know how it got there.

You should check yours.

Shit. Not like mine isn't creepy enough already...

I'll try poking around, though, see if anything turns up.

Let me know, then. The house is changing, somehow.

...And I'm not done with this place.

...that's more like it.

[chuuya gives him a quick grin, there. much better.]

Just stay on that, alright? For a few minutes there you almost sounded like-- some idiot I knew.

[he stops himself before letting a name slip, at least.]

Your old partner? [From the guestbook...]

That'd be the one. He was a hell of a lot worse about it than you, though.

[but he doesn't volunteer anything else; he's still wary of letting anyone here know too much. you never know what'll get used against you, especially if it lines up with those notes.]

Good, I'd rather not be likened to someone you want to kill.

Must be a pretty sad guy, to be worse than me.

Sad doesn't even start to cover it. Infuriating's a little closer. How anyone can be that much of a waste of space despite being successful is beyond me...

[his hands clench at the thought. at least he's not here too, or chuuya would have lost all patience with this place by day three.]

[This really reminds him just how little he actually knows about Chuuya. He's been a question mark since day one, pretty much.]

...Do you actually want him to die?

That's what the book says, isn't it?

[that book already makes him sound suspicious enough, with his skills and that mention of his partner; of course he's tried to remain a question mark.]

The guestbook isn't the end-all-be-all of us.

Somehow, I just don't see it.

...But maybe I'm wrong.

You don't?

[that's-- a surprise, honestly. chuuya would have assumed that it'd seem true, all things considered; the skills next to his photo, the fact that he's never really said much about who he is or where he comes from. but maybe he's just more suspicious of people here, himself.

he's quiet for a moment, considering that, before he finally shakes his head with a quiet laugh.]

... you really are a good kid, huh.

Far from it, actually.

...But.

At some point, you have to start trusting people. As far as you're concerned, I'm going with my gut.

[He has a certain amount of toughness, and the guestbook definitely raises a lot of questions, but...There are a lot of things about Chuuya that remind him of those other Dan members back home. Someone who has to work in less than great circumstances, but still has a good heart behind it all.

Maybe he's wrong but, like Lena said, you have to trust people, or the whole world will burn down.]

[the thing is, shintaro's not entirely wrong. he's not bad all the way through, he takes care of his subordinates, he hates losing them-- but that's not something chuuya really thinks about. he knows what he is, what he does, and while he has no shame in it-- no, he doesn't see himself as a decent person. he's always been one of the bad guys.

so it's strange to hear someone offer trust when they have no real connection to him. they aren't co-workers, they're just people stuck in the same shitty situation--

that must be enough, huh?]

... yeah, alright.

[he offers a hand out, there.]

Guess trusting your gut is all you can do in a place like this, isn't it.

If you decide you want to kill me...

[He'll take Chuuya's hand, shaking it firmly.]

Just wait until we're out of here.

[He's gonna...try so hard not to break. Really, it already feels like he's too late for him. He wants to go back to his room. Hide away from all of the pain and the loss, just like before. But Chuuya doesn't deserve to die here the way that Diana and Lena did. Like Hans and Kido and Kantera. Thug believes in him, Lena believed in him. If he can't live with himself now, just wasting away and letting more people die around him...would be even worse. Until this is over, he needs to hold it together and do what he can, no matter how miserable he is.]

I've got your back, Chuuya.

I'll do what I can for you, then.

[that's the best promise he can give, and he knows it's not much of one in return-- but when he makes deals, he doesn't go back on them. he's not in the habit of making promises he may not be able to keep, considering how impossible it is to keep anyone else from dying when they don't even know what's doing it.

he pulls his hand back and gives shintaro a nod.]

I've got a couple things to do, so-- see you around, yeah? Let me know if you find anything else out.

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week 3

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