jinglehells | on the third day of christmas my true love gave to me a trial to see whodunit

WHO KILLED CHRISTMAS?

Four hours pass. Thug Dangerzone and Brasco move all the tables together (with no help from Starshine) and the "trial room" such that it is, is set. One long table with plenty of standing room if you aren't feeling like getting buddy buddy with your new best friends. No one seems to have wanted to move the body, so right next to the long table is Kido, sort of covered with the tablecloth. (Was it made to be a reminder, of what you've lost? Or are they just lazy?)

On each spot at the table is a sandwich and apple cider, and that basket sits ominously in the middle of the table as a gruesome centerpiece reminder. Next to the food is a pen and a small notebook, like the kind they use on police procedural.

After everyone is seated, or at least standing awkwardly around, Starshine goes to stand at the head of the table and claps her hands to get everyone's attention. "Hello everyone. I hope you used your four hours wisely!" She sets a piece of paper on the table, with a variety of names. "Here's your suspect list. We were doing a little digging while you guys were busy poking around, so we've determined it's one of these idiots. Please discuss among yourself who did it. When you're ready, write their name on the paper and hand it to one of us and we'll count. When a majority of you have all written the same name, we'll stop. Or, uh, I guess if you waste enough of our time."

She looks from Brasco to Thug Dangerzone and then back to the table and the gathered masses. She waves her hand in a sweeping gesture in front of everyone, "Let the Hunger Games begin!"

23 GUESTS REMAIN

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Uh.

Okay.

I mean, if it was a dumb accident you'd just get a manslaughter charge. I think that's how it works.

Edited 2017-12-23 20:46 (UTC)

But what if it wasn't an accident?

Then you're out of luck, I guess? I don't know. Like, they straight up said murdering won't let you go home.

Exactly.

[The rules say otherwise but Ries read the rules quite differently.]

Like. They said it multiple times. So.

And it's because they said they won't let us go home so many times that it became obvious it would get me home.

...I mean I'm not gonna say I'm not a total contrarian myself.

But.

What the heck is wrong with you.

(no subject)

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:09 (UTC) - Expand

acherontiastyx - 2017-12-23 21:12 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:17 (UTC) - Expand

acherontiastyx - 2017-12-23 21:24 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:25 (UTC) - Expand

[ It's like when you have a button in front of you that says "Warning: Do Not Push," right? She can understand the rationale behind that, at the very least. Reverse psychology and all that.

Still, to take a life...she can't imagine the circumstances she must have been in, to think that was worth it. ]

I'm sorry you were that cornered...

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:16 (UTC) - Expand

radicalsix - 2017-12-23 21:21 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:22 (UTC) - Expand

radicalsix - 2017-12-23 21:29 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:34 (UTC) - Expand

I mean, we're not . . . legal . . . authorities . . .

[He pauses for a moment, frowning, but then adds:]

Anyway, we're just gonna put whoever did it in loser's jail, so they can't hurt anyone until the storm passes and you can all go.

And your certain that what you have will be sufficient to hold them?

Hell yeah. I told you, we've done this before.

...so no one's even getting actually arrested, I guess?

Oh, no, they definitely are once you all get out of here, murder's kind of a big deal. But it's not like we can teleport them to the NYPD.

Well, if that's the case the church will just have to come and get me. They can sweep all this under the rug.

[OH MY GOD?!]

I'm sure they have some way to get here.

What? No. We're not just going to let you get away with it, this isn't Mad Max, there are still laws.

I'd like to see you try to keep me from getting away with this. I'm going to go back to Kevin, after all the rules said that, right? If we murder, then we can go home.

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:02 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:05 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:06 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:10 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:11 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:13 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:15 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:27 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:33 (UTC) - Expand

happydreamed - 2017-12-23 21:08 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:10 (UTC) - Expand

happydreamed - 2017-12-23 21:12 (UTC) - Expand

cw: suicide

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:14 (UTC) - Expand

happydreamed - 2017-12-23 21:17 (UTC) - Expand

snackhabit - 2017-12-23 21:18 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:12 (UTC) - Expand

happydreamed - 2017-12-23 21:14 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:15 (UTC) - Expand

[OH MY GOD ]

I don't think we'll be releasing you to your church, honestly. My world has some nice cells that could be filled.

Edited 2017-12-23 21:17 (UTC)

I'll do that, but only if you fulfill my request. Save Kevin for me.

Oh. Weird holiday teleportation stuff only works one way.

Pretty much! Anyway, it won't be so bad. I mean, kinda sucks that a nun apparently went all psycho on a guy, but she'll get hers, so . . . justice is served, kind of?

I think you should've left that rule out because apparently it's some total reverse psychology garbage. Like. Did you have those rules before.

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:11 (UTC) - Expand

acherontiastyx - 2017-12-23 21:15 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:28 (UTC) - Expand

How does a place like this have somewhere that secure, anyway? Seems like we'd be safer if we got rid of them.

[like, if someone murders then you definitely murder them back? that's how these things work.]

Because that's not how the justice system works, oh my god. This isn't Game of Thrones, we don't just kill people at random!

The justice system works for whoever's paying it, probably.

[s h r u g]

And besides, it's not exactly 'at random'.

Not all police forces are like that.

theothermrgray - 2017-12-23 21:56 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 21:58 (UTC) - Expand

theothermrgray - 2017-12-23 21:59 (UTC) - Expand

brasco - 2017-12-23 22:00 (UTC) - Expand